THE LOST MY PARTNER NEWSLETTER  

 

VOL. IV, Issue 5    May, 2007

 

 

Brought to you monthly by Laurie Spector & Ruth Spector Webster, authors of Lost My Partner – What’ll I Do?; A Clear, Practical Guide For Coping and Finding Strength When Your Spouse Dies

 

 

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contact@lostmypartner.com

 

 

Hello and welcome to our newsletter! We know how losing a spouse can turn your whole world upside down. It can also make concentrating on anything, even an online newsletter really difficult. Just as we’ve done with our bereavement book, Lost My Partner – What’ll I Do?, we specially designed this newsletter to make getting valuable professional advice “user-friendly”. Each month we offer comfort, reassurance and practical strategies as well as useful tips from our readers.

 

We want to make this newsletter on ongoing source of support you can turn to any time, so please let us know how we can make it more relevant for you. We welcome any suggestions or ideas that you’d like to share with us.

 

Let us hear from you at: contact@lostmypartner.com

 

Thanks for joining us.

 

Warmest Wishes,

Ruth and Laurie

 

 

 

MONTHLY FEATURE

 

 

Getting the Family Through Mother and Father’s Days

Holidays can be difficult, especially during the first year after your loss. Like other holidays, Mother and Father’s Days are advertised everywhere and filled with reminders of happier family times.

 

These holidays may stir up the pain of loss for you, your children and grandchildren. Such occasions may also remind you of your own deceased parent(s).While others around them celebrate these occasions, children in particular can feel left out and troubled.

 

Try these coping tips:

 

a. Acknowledge your own feelings of loss by talking about how you miss your spouse. When children see you sad or tearful it lets them know their own feelings are normal.

b. Have younger children create “remembering” cards, with photos or drawings of special memories about their parent or grandparent.

c. Some may find it comforting to visit the cemetery or other places of remembrance on holidays.

d. If there is a family gathering, make some time to share fond or funny memories of your loved one.

 

The feelings these holidays stir up won’t just go away. It’s best to acknowledge the occasions, even briefly, especially with children. Otherwise, these emotions will come up another time.

 

 

YOUR QUESTIONS

 

 

“After living all our lives in Seattle, my husband Bob and I moved to Chicago 10 years ago because of his job. Two years ago, Bob died. Our son and daughter are grown and busy with their own families. Lately I’ve been thinking about moving back to Seattle, where my roots are.”     Betty H

 

 

Before taking such step, ask yourself the following: Will you have a support system in your new city? Should your age be a consideration? The younger you are, the easier it is to form new friendships. Also, as we get older, it’s more important to be near adult children for physical as well as emotional support; If you chose to stay put, is there any possibility your adult children may themselves relocate in the future?  Will housing costs and the local job market be important factors in your decision?

 

Whatever you decide to do, remember that in this technological age, staying in touch with loved ones is easier than ever. Good luck.

 

 

 

Discovered a coping strategy that works for you? Share it with others in future newsletters. Email us at: contact@lostmypartner.com

 

If you enjoy this newsletter, please tell your friends and/or colleagues about it.

 

If you’re interested in purchasing a copy/copies of the book, Lost My Partner – What’ll I Do?, visit our website: www.lostmypartner.com or telephone toll free at 1-877-727-3814.

 

 

(Copyright 2007 by Laurie J. Spector, M.S.W. and Ruth Spector Webster, M.S.W. All rights and all media reserved.)